First Mentor (Minimum Wage Sidekick Book 5) Page 5

  Through gritted teeth, I said, “Yes … it … does …”

  All of a sudden, Nightbolt let go of my arms and backed away. Gasping for breath, I sat up and rubbed my shoulders; although Nightbolt had let up on the pressure, my shoulders still felt like they were going to pop out of their sockets. It wasn’t the worst pain I’d ever experienced, but I honestly had not been expecting it, which made it seem worse than it was.

  Rubbing my shoulders, I looked up at Nightbolt, who stood with his arms in front of his chest again. “I didn’t know you could move so fast. Thought you were just, er, old.”

  Nightbolt chuckled. “Oh, I’m a lot slower than I was in my prime. Had I been even just another decade younger, I might have actually snapped your arms clean off. Don’t know my own strength sometimes.”

  I now wondered if Nightbolt actually was powerless or if he was just saying that to throw me off. In any case, I decided not to underestimate him again. I had no doubt that he could have snapped my arms off my body if he was younger; heck, he could probably still do it now if he put in enough effort.

  “Now, then,” said Nightbolt. He held out a hand. “Time to get you back on your feet. We’ve still got a full day of training ahead of us, after all. No point in wasting time lying on the ground like a baby playing in the mud.”

  I groaned. Today was going to be a long day.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  For the fiftieth time in the last hour, I found myself lying flat on my back, panting and exhausted, while Nightbolt stood over me, his amused grin revealing all of his yellowing, slightly crooked teeth. He didn’t appear even remotely worn out by our sparring. If anything, I thought he actually looked more energetic and even slightly younger than he did when we first started. It was as though fighting energized him, or maybe he had a secret power that let him gather strength from fighting.

  “Come on, boy,” said Nightbolt, his voice completely lacking even the slightest hint of exhaustion. “You’re not done already, are you? I could go for another hour, maybe two, or possibly even until dinner.”

  “That’s because you’re not the one getting smacked onto his back every minute,” I grumbled. “Feels like you’ve broken every bone in my body.”

  Nightbolt shook his head. “Sidekicks these days. In my day, this would be considered a light training session. Actually, it would be more like a warm-up session for the real training session later on.”

  I sat up, albeit slowly, because every bone in my body really did hurt, though none of them were actually broken as far as I could tell. “How is this supposed to help me fight supervillains, anyway? I’m not even allowed to use my powers. I don’t see how getting knocked flat on my back a million times an hour is supposed to train me for dealing with supervillains.”

  “It’s never wise to become overly dependent on one’s powers,” said Nightbolt, wagging a finger at me. “Common mistake many empowered humans make. They think that because they can fly or shoot lasers from their eyes, that that is enough to deal with any crook or villain who comes their way. It isn’t, which is why empowered humans have higher death rates in the superhero industry than their powerless, but cleverer, counterparts.”

  “They do?”

  “Yep. Check the stats yourself sometime online. You can do that with your phone nowadays, can’t you?”

  I nodded, but then said, “Still, in my experience, supervillains usually have powers of some kind, even if those powers come from weapons. I’ve beaten a lot of supervillains by using my powers.”

  “But what will you do when you run into a supervillain who you can’t beat with your powers?” Nightbolt said. “Did that ever occur to you? Or did you really believe that you can beat everyone with your lasers?”

  I opened my mouth to respond, but then a sharp knock on the barn doors caused me to look over my shoulder. We had left the barn doors open, so there was no real reason for someone to knock; still, I saw two people standing in the entryway, two people I had never seen before.

  Both wore identical black suits, but that was where their similarities ended. One was a tall, but well-muscled, white man with long, blonde hair and a strange smile, while the other was a black man with a short crew cut style, his mouth stuck in a perpetual scowl. My first guess was that they were traveling salesmen due to their suits, but then I remembered that traveling salesmen weren’t really a thing anymore, and besides they didn’t give off the air of people wanting to sell stuff.

  “Howdy there, pardners,” said the white guy in the fakest Texan accent I’d ever heard. “Hope we’re not interrupting anything important. We just came to ask for a cup of sugar from our dear neighbor.”

  I blinked. “Who are—”

  Nightbolt’s hand suddenly rested on my shoulder, causing me to look up at him again. He was not looking at me. Instead, he was looking at the two newcomers with a look of dislike on his face. Even though Nightbolt had not said a word to me, I could tell that he wanted me to be quiet while he spoke with those two.

  “Agent Camel, your accent is fake as hell,” said Nightbolt without raising his voice. “As usual.”

  The white man—the one named Agent Camel—suddenly stopped smiling. “It ain’t that bad, given how I’m from California, not Texas. Besides, it’s fun to try to imitate accents, isn’t it, Agent Jake?”

  Agent Camel—whose actual voice had a Jersey accent—addressed that question to his taciturn friend. His fellow agent did not do anything except stand there with his normal stoic face, though I could tell by his lack of surprise that this must have been a regular habit of Agent Camel’s, and not one that Agent Jake found amusing, either.

  “Ah, what do you know,” said Agent Camel, shaking his head. “I forgot that you don’t know how to have fun around here. Sometimes I feel like the only person in this whole town who does.”

  “Agents Camel and Jake,” said Nightbolt, again in that same calm voice, though I noticed a hint of an edge on it this time. “What do you want?”

  Agent Camel put his hands on his chest. “No need to use that tone, Nightbolt. We’ve known each other for so long now that we’re more like close acquaintances than strangers. Right, Jake?”

  Once again, Agent Jake said nothing. I was under the impression that Agent Jake probably didn’t agree with Camel, though his complete lack of facial expression made it hard to read him.

  “Just because we’ve worked together on the alien issues means nothing,” said Nightbolt. “You two work for the government. I don’t.”

  “And what a shame that is,” said Camel. “If you were about fifty years younger and less of a libertarian, you would make a great CIA agent.”

  “If I were fifty years younger, I’d be kicking your ass right now for wasting my time,” Nightbolt replied. “Might still do it, if you don’t get to the point.”

  “Sure, sure, I’ll—” Camel stopped speaking when he noticed me. “Who’s the kid?”

  “Um, my name is Beams,” I said as I slowly rose to my feet; I had to rise slowly because every bone in my body hurt. “I’m the sidekick of Rubberman, the superhero of Golden City.”

  “The Rubberman?” said Camel in an impressed-sounding voice. “Interesting. I’d heard he gotten a new sidekick recently, but I didn’t know the name of his sidekick. Ain’t that interesting, Jake?”

  Jake nodded once. “Yes. Quite.”

  “As economical as ever, my friend,” said Camel with a chuckle. “Well, because you were so polite as to introduce yourself to us, allow me to introduce me and my friend. I’m Agent Charlie Camel, while my tall, dark, and handsome friend here is Agent Rodney Jake. We’re from the government.”

  “I suppose you’re not here to help, are you?” Nightbolt muttered low enough so that only I could hear him.

  Agent Camel pulled out a badge and flashed it at me briefly. “More specifically, we’re from the Department of Extraterrestrial Affairs. Ever heard of it?”

  I nodded. “Yeah, but I don’t know much about it.”

  �
�Good, because you’re not supposed to know about it,” said Camel as he slipped his badge back into his inner coat pocket. “Not that it matters, of course, because we’re given to understand that you are already aware of the alien activity in this area.”

  “What do you mean?” I said. “Who told you that?”

  “The Gonzaleses, of course,” said Camel. “Nice family, they are, though a bit rude, wouldn’t you say, Jake?”

  Jake merely nodded once, though it was such a subtle gesture that it looked less like a nod and more like a slight dip of his head.

  “Anyway, Jose Gonzales told us that you two had already been by their place,” said Camel, addressing Nightbolt and I again. “Said you already took a look at the black circle. We came here to find out if you had, ah, noticed anything which the government might take an interest in.”

  “Oh, we did,” I said, nodding. “We—”

  All of a sudden, Nightbolt elbowed me in the gut. I doubled over, covering my hands with my gut as I gasped in pain.

  “Excuse the boy,” said Nightbolt to Camel and Jake. “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about. He just got here today, after all, though he did go with me to the black circle.”

  Through the tears in my eyes, I could tell that neither Camel nor Jake believed a word of what Nightbolt said. I thought, briefly, about telling these two guys about the wristband-like object which Jose gave us, but I decided that Nightbolt probably had a reason for not wanting the government to know about the object, so I kept my mouth shut. Besides, I didn’t trust either Camel or Jake. Camel was too easygoing and overly friendly, while Jake was as unreadable as a brick wall. Maybe that’s why the government had hired these two to do whatever work they were supposed to do. I also noticed that Spike, though staying on his bed in the corner, was eying both Camel and Jake very carefully, though he wasn’t growling or baring his teeth just yet.

  “Truth of the matter is, we didn’t find anything that you didn’t,” said Nightbolt. “We saw the black circle, heard Jose and Teresa’s story, and then went back home to finish lunch. The only significant thing we found out was that this abduction occurred during the middle of the day, rather than at night like they usually do.”

  “Yes, Jose told us that, too,” said Camel. “First time it ever happened, right, Jake?”

  “Right,” said Jake, his voice low but clear.

  “It’s not a good development, no matter how you look at it,” said Nightbolt, shaking his head. “If the aliens are feeling bold enough to conduct their abductions during the day, there’s a good possibility that they are going to do something worse later on. Maybe even an outright alien invasion.”

  “Or they’ll move onto abducting humans to probe,” said Camel. “We don’t know, of course, if these aliens actually do ‘probe’ humans, but it’s always possible, isn’t it, Jake?”

  This time, Jake didn’t show any sign that he had heard what Camel said. My guess was that Jake didn’t want to dignify that question with an answer, though like I said, Jake was a hard read.

  “Anyway, are you sure that’s all, Nightbolt?” said Camel, looking at Nightbolt again. “Sure seems like there should be more than a black circle at that site, wouldn’t you agree?”

  “Only if you assume that the aliens are careless,” said Nightbolt. “Perhaps they’re more careful with their possessions than you are.”

  Camel’s friendly, amused smile suddenly turned into a scowl. “Why you little—”

  Jake put a firm hand on Camel’s shoulder, causing Camel to look at him. Jake shook his head once, but even from a distance, I thought it was an authoritative gesture. I wondered if Jake had some sort of authority over Camel or if he was just calmer than him.

  In any case, Camel’s shoulders relaxed. When he looked back at Nightbolt and me, his friendly, amused smile had returned, though it seemed a bit faker now, as if he was actively trying to hide something now. “Good jab, Nightbolt. Reminds me of all the stories my grandpa used to tell me about you. Said you always had a clever quip for every supervillain you fought.”

  “Clever quips ain’t just for supervillains, son,” said Nightbolt dryly. “They’re also for idiots who are trespassing on my property after I’ve told them everything I know but still want to hang around because they, like everyone else in the government, don’t know the meaning of ‘privacy.’”

  Camel looked like he was going to scowl again, but then he just smiled even wider than before. “Well, at least I’m smart enough to take a hint. Because it looks like you really don’t have any more information for us, Jake and I will just let ourselves out. We have lots of paperwork to fill out and reports to file about this incident, even though we didn’t learn much from it, right, Jake?”

  “Yes,” said Jake. “Paperwork. Reports. Photos. Writing.”

  “The four horsemen of the Bureacolypse,” said Camel with a sigh. “Anyway, time for us to go. And, Nightbolt, if you remember any details about the black circle or the aliens which may have slipped your mind, don’t be afraid to give us a friendly call.”

  Camel winked at us and then left, with Jake following quietly behind. Nightbolt immediately walked over to the barn doors and pulled them both closed hard enough to make dust shake from the ceiling. He turned around and muttered a certain four letter curse word under his breath that probably would have earned me a scolding from my mother when I was five or six.

  “So, uh,” I said, scratching the back of my head. “Those two seemed, er, interesting.”

  “Interesting? More like annoying,” said Nightbolt, shaking his head. “Always dropping in unannounced, talking to me like I’m some senile old man, and scaring the neighbors while they’re at it. One of these days I’m going to sic Spike on them and pretend that Spike got out of control. See how they like that.”

  “Whoa,” I said. “They didn’t seem that bad to me. Sure, that Camel guy seemed like a self-important jackass, but Jake seemed solid.”

  “Only their brains are solid,” said Nightbolt. “Those two by themselves have probably convinced the aliens that our government can’t do jack shit. Which, to be fair, isn’t entirely far off from the truth.”

  “Is that why you lied to them about the device Jose gave you?” I said. “Because you think they’re incompetent?”

  “Because I think the government is incompetent,” said Nightbolt. “But more than that, I know that the only reason they’re out here at all is because the government is hoping to get its hands on alien tech it could use to increase its own power. Luckily, the aliens don’t usually leave any weapons or technology behind, but that hasn’t stopped those two bastards from snooping around like they own the place.”

  “How long have they been out here?” I said. “You act like you’ve known them for a while.”

  “About a year,” said Nightbolt. “That’s when the first abduction began and when I first became aware of the aliens. The government asked me to work with them and I accepted their offer, because I thought that the government’s resources might be helpful in dealing with this situation, but I now regret it immensely. Not much I can do about it now, I guess, because they won’t leave until their boss back in D.C. tells them to.”

  “What should we do about them?” I said. “How should I treat them while I’m here?”

  “Just be polite and try not to argue with them too much,” said Nightbolt, waving a hand at me dismissively. “They’ll probably try to get you to tell them about anything we’ve found. Those two can be real slick, especially Camel, so if you find yourself talking to one or both of them, be very aware of the questions they ask you and the answers you give. They should just talk to me, but the government doesn’t exactly have a sterling track record of doing what it is supposed to do as opposed to what it wants to do.”

  I nodded. I made a mental note to avoid those two government agents as much as possible. Of course, it seemed like they didn’t come around unless an alien event happened, so I just had to hope that no more alien abductions w
ould happen over the next four weeks. Hopefully, things would stay quiet and peaceful for the rest of my stay here.

  CHAPTER SIX

  Over the rest of the week, I got beaten time and again in the Arena. Nightbolt allowed me to use my eye beams on the second day, but even with my lasers, I couldn’t land even one hit on him. I did, however, almost fry Spike once, who kept his distance from me for the rest of the day until I fed him a bit of steak during dinner, at which point he became my best friend in the world. I don’t think Nightbolt was particularly happy about me feeding his dog table scraps, though.

  I quickly fell into a basic routine. From the crack of dawn in the morning to the setting of the sun at night, I trained in the Arena with Nightbolt. We’d take breaks for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Sometimes, Nightbolt would drive into town to do some grocery shopping, but we otherwise didn’t go anywhere. Nightbolt insisted that there was nothing in town related to my training, so I didn’t need to go visit anyone there. I was under the impression, though, that he didn’t want me getting into trouble with the townsfolk, because I still remembered what he told me about the different ways that small town people looked at superheroes versus how city people did.

  Not that I was capable of having more than a quick impression of any one given thing. Like I said, I was training all the time and barely got any chance to sit down and think. By the time the sun set, I was so exhausted that I always fell asleep the minute my head hit the pillow, sometimes even before then, and often in my costume with only the helmet removed. Nightbolt, of course, never showed any signs of exhaustion, which meant he was either the healthiest ninety-something-year-old man in the world or he was really good at hiding it.

  There wasn’t any alien-related activity during the week, either. Sure, Nightbolt kept the strange alien necklace/watch on his desk in his room, but no aliens ever came by to pick it up or take it back. Nor did we see anything from Agents Camel and Jake, which was fine by me, because the more I thought about Camel’s casual, fast-talking behavior and Jake’s silent attitude, the more I disliked them. Of course, like I said before, I didn’t really get much chance to think about anything.